Being into surrealism, the bizarre and other random forms of associating ideas I found myself writing a fishy fish things page. It indulges in the range of things fishy from sayings to songs and from chocolate to philosophy. It briefly touches on Jean Baudrillard's treatise "Simulacra and simulation" and the way it is our simulation of reality that is the only real reality. There is definitely something fishy about this page. Perhaps it is that in the 47,476 words of Baudrillard's treatise not only does the word fish never once appear but the letters f, i, s & h never appear consecutively. Not even in words like fishwives, wolfish, elfishly, raffish, fisheye, selfishly, fishmonger (which is in fact what my father's mother's father was), oafishness or standoffishness!
A pertinent subject for Toxic Drums really. It seems that the US FDA have finally discovered that levels of lead in the cherry flavoured Toxic Waste Nuclear Sludge Candy Bars imported from Pakistan are a wee bit too high. They've been importing them for six years without testing them. See TOXIC WASTE CANDY IS REALLY TOXIC! for much more info on the subject. They say that it can present a health risk to children and pregnant women. Lead poisoning can cause mental retardation and it makes you wonder if the men are immune or already retarded. All Toxic Waste candy bars are being recalled but the levels are only 0.24 parts per million (that's 0.14 ppm above the safe level) so the actual health risks are minimal and there are no reported cases of lead poisoning due to these bars (so far). Ironic really that Pakistan is exporting Nuclear Sludge to the USA.
A sign in Tesco reads "We participate in a Civil Debt Recovery scheme".What does it mean?
Well in short it is a euphemism for a semi-legal mafia style blackmailing scheme.The justification is that the law doesn't protect retailers from petty theft and so they have decided to take the law into their own hands and issue threatening letters to any individual who they suspect has stolen from them or intended to steal from them.These threatening letters do not follow due process of law and intimidate and frighten people into paying them large sums of money to avoid prosecution.
It is an appalling decomposition of the law by otherwise respectable British Companies like Tesco, Shell, Boots, Debenhams and other well known names.The Citizen's Advice Bureau have written an extensive report on the issue and there has NEVER been one case successfully pursued through the courts.Although their actions are literally legal there is no doubt this is underhand and against the spirit of the law.
If you have received one of these letters DO NOT pay the blood money.Seek help, go to your local CAB, go to the police, get a solicitor but do not pay the mafia the money.